Take Your Mama Out All Night, Or At Least Make Her Breakfast

posted May 7, 2008

by Josh Gunn

http://cooking.cdkitchen.com/BachelorChow/695.html

The Scissor Sisters want you to take your mama out this Saturday night and get her "jacked up on cheap champagne." That sounds like a good idea, except for the fact my mama is a teetotaler and lives three states away. I'm going to make her a mix-CD of music I know she will enjoy (blues and Texas country music—the real stuff, not that crap on the radio) and probably send her flowers. If you're lucky enough to live near your mum and she likes the bubbly, you should definitely take her and "let the good times all roll out." At the very least, you should make your mother breakfast on Sunday.

Why breakfast? Because it's Mother's Day, silly, and that's the holiday when we show our mums how awesome they are. Okay, but you ask again, why breakfast?? I'm not sure why breakfast is the meal, but something about making breakfast for someone---as opposed to dinner or lunch or barbecuing---communicates extra specialness.

For starters, breakfast at home usually means you have bed-head and you look like you just got up. No one can be judgmental about appearances at breakfast. You all look terrible and so any pretense is out the window. Second, you actually have to make the effort to get up before everyone else does to start making the food; getting up earlier to serve others is a nice gesture. Finally, moms are always the ones making the breakfast (unless its one of those Jimmy Dean commercials where My Dad, the Sun is making everyone's day brighter with frozen goodness). By making the breakfast for your mother, it’s a complete role-reversal! She'll love it!

Okay, so, you are going to make breakfast for your mama on Mother's Day. What do you make? First things first: keep it simple. If you do something way too fancy that early in the morning, you bachelors are going to burn yourselves and possible ruin your mother's kitchen. I know how you are in the morning, so just say no to the three-layer quiche or fancy goat-meat frittata. What you want to make is something that is very easy but that appears really fancy. I've got the perfect breakfast: Eggs Benedict with Hollandaise and fresh fruit! This breakfast will not win any awards from the American Heart Foundation, but, you know, it's just one meal on a very special day for your mother. Is mother worth a little Hollandaise sauce? You bet your mother she is!

For the fruit, I suggest a nice orange (blood ones, if you can find them—so good!). Cut an orange in half, and then slice each of the halves into half-moons. Arrange three or four half-moons on top of one another for a pretty presentation on the plate. The hardest part of this breakfast is the Eggs Benedict, and the real trick is poaching the eggs. I'll explain how to assemble the dish with the formal recipe, but I need to say a word or two about poaching eggs first.

I have an egg poacher pan which works really well, and some folks have had luck with the little silicon egg poachers (most cooking stores carry them, and they're pretty cheap). But if you ain't got poaching aids, here's how you do it: boil some water in a stock pot or large pan, and add about a tablespoon or three of white vinegar. The vinegar helps to pickle the egg a little so it holds together during poaching. Once your water is boiling, use the handle of a wooden spoon or a spatula and make the water spin like a tornado. As the water is spinning, crack an egg into the vortex. The water's motion will encourage the egg to wrap around itself while it cooks.

Not only is this a helpful poaching method, but it's a lot of fun and reminds me of going to the science museum as a kid and pushing the "create a tornado" button in this giant box filled with water—we would mash and mash that button, it was like our favorite exhibit next to the face mini dinosaurs.

Okay, where was I? Poaching, yes. After about 2-3 minutes remove the egg and set aside on a plate and cook another egg. The middle should still be runny. When you're just about ready to assemble the plates of food, stick the eggs back into the hot water and warm them up briefly.

Dr. Bachelor's Mother's Day Eggs Benedict Recipe
http://www.cdkitchen.com/

Serves/Makes: 4
Ready in: < 30 minutes

***Hollandaise Sauce***

* 4 egg yolks
* 2 sticks butter, melted
* 1 medium lemon
* 1 dash black pepper
* 1 dash cayenne pepper

***Eggs***

* sprig of herbs from the garden (e.g., chives, rosemary, or thyme)
* 8 eggs
* 2 tablespoons white vinegar
* 8 slices Canadian bacon
* 4 English muffins, split
* butter or margarine or butter substitute
* capers and parsley to garnish

Eggs Benedict is easy to make; the hard part is actually the timing.

Go ahead and poach your eggs first since you can heat them back up easily (see directions above). Now, set your oven to broil and arrange your English muffins on a cookie sheet or two, and do the same for the bacon. Spread butter or some other substitute on the muffins. Stick the bacon and muffins into the oven about three or four minutes before serving time.

The hollandaise can be made a number of ways; many folks prefer to make it with a double boiler, however, I prefer the quick and easy blender method. Put the egg yolks into your blender and blend. Melt your butter in a saucepan until it's nice and bubbly and scalding hot, but not burning. Transfer the butter to something that can pour easily without a mess, and then, with your blender on the lowest setting, slowly pour the butter into the blender. At my house this makes an absolute mess because my blender doesn't go low enough, but pouring the butter through the hole-in-the-lid helps to reduce splatter. Then, squeeze your lemon for the juice and add the juice to the sauce and blend. If the lemon is HUGE, you'll have too much juice, so be careful not to add more than a tablespoon of juice. Now, season with black pepper and cayenne (I like it hot, but your mom may not).

To finally assemble the dish, brown your muffins and bacon in the oven and reheat your poached eggs. Now, on each plate put two halves of a muffin, top each with the bacon, and then top them with poached eggs. Finally, pour the hollandaise sauce over each egg-topped muffin. Drop a few capers on the sauce-drenched muffins and wallah! A breakfast your mama will love. And heck, why not use that cheap champagne for some mimosas while you're at it?